I have it easier than most people.
I’m not just talking about all the privilege that I have (white, male, cis, hetero, American, middle class, etc.,.)
I’m talking about smartphones, and how I never owned one.
This makes my experience much different from most people, I know. And by “most” I mean 81%, according to the Pew Research Center.
But there’s a lesson in this, for both me who never owned a smartphone, and you, who likely does, or at least did.
Everybody’s working for the weekend
On the drive over to the coffee shop where I do most of my writing, I found myself listening to an AM radio program, a home-improvement show where two guys talk about manly things like furnaces.
One of them was talking about how so much technology is infusing traditional appliances, such as the ability to turn on your heater or AC remotely. Most of these can be controlled through the ease of your phone.
“And that makes so much sense, since your phone is always in your hand.”
“For better or worse! [Laugh]“
Phones aside, these sorts of conversations make my skin crawl. It’s the same thing when people say, “hey, it’s almost the weekend!” I hate the social impulse to connect with others through tacit acceptance of things in life that we dislike, or at least claim to.
I don’t want to tacitly accept anything. If you hate your job so much that you can’t wait for the weekend, get another job.
And if you don’t like how much your phone has infected your life, then do something about it.
But I recognize that it’s hard.
The opiate of the masses
I have never tried opiates, aside from perhaps some Tylenol with Codeine when I was a kid.
But I’ve known people who have done them, and even known a couple of people who had wrestled with addiction.
The quote I remember the most was from a friend of mine, trying heroin for the first time:
“It was the best feeling I’ve ever felt. And that’s why I’ll never do it again.“
So far as I know, he hasn’t.
But I imagine that it’s a little harder for him to resist trying heroin or other opioids than it is for me. Because I literally don’t know what I’m missing. And he does.
The situation is of course, so much worse for people recovering from addictions. When people use phrases like “being hugged by Jesus“, you know you’re not just dealing with a regular ol’ fun time.
Now imagine that your relationship to opioids has gone wrong, and now you can’t have it anymore. But you know, out there, somewhere out there, that feeling that changed your brain and made you feel regulated and at peace in the way that nothing else may have ever done for you is out there, just waiting for you.
I can’t imagine how hard that is for people. I’d like to think that I would have that kind of resilience, but I don’t really know.
Phones and addiction
If you are a little askance that I’m equating opioid addiction with smartphone usage, why exactly?
The data is in. Smartphones can be as addicting as drugs. Smartphone addiction could be changing your brain. Nomophobia—fear of being without your smartphone—affects 40% of the population. I could keep going.
I’m once again reminded of that famous phrase from the movie War Games
“The only winning move is not to play”
Looking to the future
So if you’re a recovering smartphone addict, or even just looking to lessen your dependence on smartphones, you in all likelihood have it tougher than I do. Aside from some occasional brief pangs of feeling left out, it’s never felt like something I’d want to get involved with.
I’ve tried to talk about some of the ways that you can frame the benefits of not using a smartphone in life on this site.
But I know that, like addiction, you need to be ready to hear it.
Since the smartphone addiction train has left the station, we must instead look to the future. The next time the new, magical, life-changing—whatever adjective the next Steve Jobs calls it—thing is released, we should hold back, wait, not be an early adopter.
Just because something is new doesn’t mean it’s better. It might be, but it might not.
Eventually we’ll realize the tradeoffs of smartphones, and the technology (and our behavior) will change. It’ll have to. Smartphones might make life easier, but they don’t make us happy. So let’s be ready for what comes next. It might be better to not know what you’re missing.
